Looking for a job....

...for G-Man...

The kid has no clue...

I tried to help him get one yesterday, but that did not go too well.

It started yesterday morning as I am trying to get into work - literally. I have my overloaded computer bag in one hand, purse and umbrella in the other, trying to swipe my employee access card and turn the door handle before the access goes red and I get totally drenched, when my purse starts ringing.

Me (thinking it is my boss wondering where the hell I am): Hello.
G-Man: Hey, where are you.
Me: Take 3 guesses.
G-Man: You at work?
Me: Trying to get there.
G-Man: Well the bank screwed me over again. I put that money in you gave me yesterday to cover late fees and it says I am negative again!!!
Me: Go to the bank and get it figured out.
G-Man: But I was positive yesterday when I put in that money...
Me: Just go to the bank and get it straightened out ...
G-Man: Can I ....
Me: Do not even ask me for more money ...
G-Man: Geez Mom, you act like this is my fault...
Me: Just go take care of it...

Lucky for him I was in the office ... or maybe lucky for me, because if I said what was on my mind I would be looking for a job now, too.


When I got home, he smugly told me that he went to the bank and took care of it...talked the guy into dropping some of the fees...must be nice.

He then started rambling about something and quite honestly, I am not sure what happened after that...I just let loose (as I do at times).

I guess he was just having too much fun after having borrowed $200 from me to pay late fees because he did not have any money in his account to begin with...and I am still waiting for car insurance and phone money from him this month...hoping and praying that I have not taken anything out of my account that I forgot to mark down...otherwise I will be seeing some late fees, too.

And then his report card showed up on the table and we have two totally different opinions about what he can and cannot do in the classroom...

Lucky for both of us it is Father's Day Weekend...because we are definitely in need of a little time apart...

Working Dinners....

This has been a work week....

Our localization vendor's team is in town trying to help us do things better...

Actually we get to tell them what we like and do not like about how they are doing things and they explain to us that you only get what ya pay for....one for the vendor:)

So anyway, a coworker and one of my favorite vendor contacts decided to go to dinner Wednesday evening. Unfortunately, they made the mistake of thinking that I could show them a good time. They wanted to eat somewhere outside, overlooking the water....

So we headed downtown...

And walked the streets a little....

And made some new friends who were also from out of town and hoping I knew a good place to get some spirits....

Me (pointing across the alley): That looks like a fun place.
Them: Sure, honey, let's go check it out....
Vendor: Uh, Phillipia, huunnneeee, what are you doing????
Me: What, they wanted spirits???
Them: You girls like to party???
Me: OMG!!! Not the Adult Mart - the lil Irish pub next door. It's there - see it???

The pot at the end of the rainbow...

Another dream shattered...

WTF?

So I have been faithfully wearing my activity monitor for the 2-1/2 weeks.

I actually make th eeffort to reach 100% of my goal each day...

And I do pretty good.

In fact, I usually go over by about 75% (3 round trips to the fridge about covers that).

But today, I was at my desk or in meetings allllll morning...did not get a bit of exercize except to mozy from meeting to meeting and out to my car for a curb-side lunch pick-up.

I usually try to synchronize the monitor with my online data a couple times a day to make sure I keep on track. So, when I got back to my desk after lunch, I plugged the monitor into the USB adapter on my computer. I was expecting to be at about 25% of my goal for the day, if that.

But what should my wondering eyes see...a whopping 500%...with the most activity during my morning meetings....WTF????

I checked and double-checked and changed the battery, and even read the manual, but nothing changed...I was actively burning calories sitting in meetings. Gotta love that:)

I was having an awesome day(per my Peyton PHlaCe activity monitor, anyway) and feeling pretty good about it too.

Off to an afternoon of more meetings....

I am sitting there minding my own business basking in the glory of knowing that I am burning calories just being me....

Voice1: Are you alright?
Me: Yeah, I'm fine, why?
Voice1: You're twirling that activity monitor around like its alive...
Voice2: Isn't that cheating?

Ahhhh...that would explain a few things...

And how can I make this work for me????

I may be funny, but I am not pretty....

I was browsing for content for G-man's calendar Friday. Saturday was ACT day, so I was looking for test material. When I googled "fun tests" the first few returns were for OKCupid.com....hmmm.

A friend had tried to get me to try OK Cupid, so of course I saw this as a sign...

And, against my instincts that kept screaming...NOOOOO, do not do this to yourself again...I did. I posted a profile.

I had not even finished filling out the profile when I got an instant message. I swear, I am a magnet...

IM: Hi, my name is Sam. I want to get to know you. Are you married.
ME: No....
IM: Do you want to be married?
ME: Not right now....
IM: Oh...Do you have children?
ME: Yes.
IM: Oh...well we can work around that.
ME: Really?
IM: Oh yes. Do you date other men?
ME: Not right now.
IM: Good. Can you come to New Mexico?
ME: Why?
IM: I want to marry you.
ME: Uhhh....I gotta go.

Ok, should I just delete my profile now? Oh no, not me...Let's take this a little farther.

There is a forum on the site - ok a few of them - but one that caught my attention. A member was offering advice on profiles. Since mine never seems to get me too far, no matter where I post, I thought it could not hurt to ask for some advice.

Apparently, my picture sucks. I guess I should have gotten the message when someone on another site I posted on commented that he already had a dog.

Mr. Letmecritiqueyourprofile on OK Cupid asked why anyone would post such an awful picture....

ummmm...cuz it's me. I thought they'd get mad if I posted someone else...

So I took down my picture. That little grey profile of a female face is much more attractive.

I really was just looking for comments on the content of my profile...but I am guessing it was just too tough to get past that picture...

Think anyone would get past a picture of Phillipia?

Maybe then I could dazzle them with my personailty before they saw the real me:)