Faded memories....

The triple tragedy in Japan dislodged this life changing memory...

At my previous job...

For a company that wrote banking software...

Before Peyton PHlaCe...

Several years ago....

In September 2011 to be more exact....

I was preparing to train some coworkers on some of the finer points of Microsoft Office...

We had one conference room in this office.

It was pretty nice...

Several computer stations and a big screen t.v....

I was just getting ready to set it up for my training session...

It was a little before 9:00 AM on Sept 11th....

When, as you know, everything went to shit....

Suddenly the conference room was chaos....

People running in and out, watching the events unfold and  frantically trying to get in touch with relatives, friends, and clients who lived/worked in NY.

Everyone was an  emotional wreck...

I naturally canceled my training...

Or tried to...

My boss did not understand...

Work must go on she told me....

OMG...these people do not NEED this training to do their job...

It was something SHE insisted they learn...

I tried to reason with her that they were in no frame of mind to learn...

Nor I to teach...

I ended up having to flat out refuse to hold the class...

I was not going to shut off the tv and kick everyone out of the room....

Obviously she did not have friends/relatives living in NY...

Or compassion for those who did....

Or so I thought....

A couple of days later, suddenly, she becomes very compassionate...

She set up numerous fund raisers to help the victims of 911...

And she insisted on 100% participation....

She developed ongoing 50-50 office bingo...

While we were supposed to be working....

Winning numbers were being announced every few seconds by email...

The winner "won" 50% of the total amount collected to participate...

The other 50% went to some designated charity...

And most of the time the winner's share went to the charity too because they were shamed into it...

Too bad I never won - I would have kept my share...

Just because I do not like to be shamed into charity...

Another one of her great ideas that month was a sweater sale...

Her used - unwanted sweaters...

All profits go to 911 victims...

Unfortunately the lady had a really bad, really noticeable dandruff problem....

 So the sweaters were not only unwanted by her....

They were unwanted...

Being my boss, she assigned me the task of organizing this sale...

I flat out refused....

Notice a pattern here???

I am not a good employee....

She found another underling who was a little more cooperative....

And who bought most of the sweaters herself....

I am pretty sure I noticed them in the trash bin on the way out that evening....

But I digress....

I have a late September birthday....

I had heard rumors that this boss was known to give good presents to her employees...

And take them to awesome places to lunch...

I had bad feelings about this...

I did not want to go to lunch with her....

Especially since the last birthday girl had the privilege of sharing an afternoon at the spa with this lady....

I do not do spas....

At least not with people I do not like...

I am not pretty in a towel...

And I am pretty sure she is not either....

But I was lucky...

No spa day for me...

The events of 911 saved me from that....

On my birthday, she presented me with a check in front of the entire staff....

A check  for  $50 made out to the charity of the day....

Everyone clapped and thanked me and wished me a happy birthday....

And I smiled and proceeded to my desk to send a thank you note to my boss....

Thank you for your generous gift.  I know your birthday is next month and I hope you understand that I have a  rule about not buying coworkers gifts...
Not for birthdays....
Not for holidays...
Not ever....

And then I proceeded to update my resume....

You are probably thinking that I am a pretty selfish bitch about now....

I really am not...

I do give to charities...

But I prefer to give what I want to give...

To who I want...

When I want....

I do not appreciate being conned or shamed into it...

Especially in the work place...

Facebook Freddy...

This is a story about a friend...


A Facebook friend that is...


This friend and I supposedly were in the same grade at the same St. Hell Mary grade school...


I am taking his word for that...


I sort of remember someone in my class with his name...


Facebook Freddy...


Ok, that's not his real name because there was no Facebook way back then...


But I'll call him that here ...


Just because I can...


I sure as hell have no good memory of what Freddy looked like back in 2nd grade...


Tho' I sort of remember being in Sr. Mary Principal's office with this kid who may have been Freddy; he was getting smacked around because apparently after his First Confession Fr.Celibate got up and walked right out of the church mumbling something about being done with this priesthood shit...


I never did find out what the kid confessed to...



Anyway...


Facebook Freddy sent me a friend request awhile back when the St. Hell Mary class of WayBackWhen started to organize a reunion...


Freddy was one of many friendships I re-established from grade school over the last few months due to this reunion thingy....


I have to admit, I was and am still a little wary of some of these so-called  friend requests...


I was not the most popular kid in school...


In fact, I was on the total opposite end of popular...


When kids in school acted like they wanted to be my friend...


Well, they usually didn't...


I was most likely being set up as the butt of some joke...


In fact, I was the butt of so many jokes growing up, that I know have a very big ...


But I digress...


Whatever kind of kid FacebookFreddy was way back when, he seems to have matured into...


Well, maybe he hasn't matured...


I really do knot know him other than on Facebook...


But he is one of my more likable friends on Facebook...


Right up there with my kids...


Who keep threatening to delete me because I "Like" them too much....


But that's a story  for another post...


Back to Freddy...


Who I do not know other than on Facebook...


That is important here...


Not that I haven't thought that I might like to get to know him other than on Facebook...


But you know that whole grade school butt joke thing still has a grip ....


So Freddy, from his FB postings anyway, did not seem to have a steady GF...


In fact, he had just posted an ad seeking a sugar momma...


Hmmm....


And Freddy makes no secret about his love for BEER....it's always beer-thirty somewhere...


And he does seem to know how to have a good time...


Apparently, too good of a time....


Suddenly, about a week or so ago, Freddy changed his FB relationship status to "engaged"...


Freddy?????


Engaged????


Well, congrats, I guess....

Oh, she's having his baby...
The rabbit died....
Gotta do the right thing....
Someone he has been seeing a while...

I can understand...


I know what it's like to have a good time and not quite remember of all the details the next day...


But it seems strange that none of his other Facebook friends seem to know this girl ...


I assume most of his other Facebook  friends actually do know him outside of Facebook ...


But I could be wrong....


I have been wrong a couple of times before in my life...


Apparently his relationship with this "someone" was suddenly being renewed with vigor...


Or a shotgun....


The date is set...


April 1st...


We're all invited...


.......


And that's when the light came on....


Now I remember Freddy....


He was an ass...


And still is....


But a likable one at that...


BTW, does anyone know what the protocol is in a situation like this...


If presents have been bought already, Freddy claims that are no take-backs...


But that gift-boxed bottle of Jose sitting on my dining room table is calling my name...

It's all fun and games til...

I spent an enjoyable Friday evening with LDBoy and MGirl and CareBear ...


Well, mostly enjoyable anyway...


The food was awesome...


A home cooked meal I did not have to help cook or cleanup after....


And cake for dessert....


And then it was tv time....


And that is when the fun started to get a lil shaky...


At first things were ok...


We watched a couple of DVRd sitcoms that I had not seen...


Then we spent a few minutes trying to agree on what movies to watch...


When snakes on a plane was mentioned my first reaction was "no way in hell" followed by "maybe I should just leave now"...


But everyone else started making jokes about it and mimicking lines from it...


Until somehow I got the impression that it was a national lampoon type movie...

This could be fun....


WRONG....


I HATE scary movies...


And there is absolutely NOTHING funny about snakes on a plane...


No matter how fake they look or how unbelievable the whole thing is....


What was I thinking????


After that fiasco was over, they wanted to watch Best of Show....


Which none of them had seen, but they heard was hilarious...


At this point I did not trust their judgement anymore...


What do the dogs do????


Do they start attacking the trainers???


Do they turn into werewolves???


The whole movie I kept waiting for something bad (as in alien bad)  to happen...


Thankfully, I was disappointed...


But, needless to say, I will not be jumping on a plane anytime soon...