Saturday, February 6, 2010

Heard over the wall....

...at Peyton PHlaCe....
My wife will not let me play handball any more....

Where's my Peyton????

Early morning t-times let me get back in bed before the wife.....what????

What's your wife doing this weekend???

These numbers suck...

Hey, did you see the memo...we did sucky last year but we did a good job of it...we're getting a bonus!

Let's suck harder next year!

What memo???

What bonus???

Just kidding....no memo...no bonus ...

Damn, FPM, when are you going to learn to keep that shit to yourself???

I forgot they were over there...




Ha - this time I got the memo, too!

Probably by mistake, but can't take it away now!

Not that it will make much difference...

2% of hardly anything is not a whole hell of a lot of motivation to suck harder next year!

But, if I invest it in lotto tickets, maybe I will win the big one...

Now that's a retirement plan!

Friday, February 5, 2010

Peyton Visited the Office Today...



I had to protect him from all the local Saints fans trying to kidnap him....

Yeah...it was a tough job....

But someone had to do it...

Yeah...that's a lot of bull...

This made me laugh out loud in a meeting when I got it so I thought I should share it.....

A DEA officer stops at a ranch in South Dakota, and talks with an old rancher.

DEAO: I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs.
Rancher (pointing over there): Okay, but stay out of that field over
there...

DEAO: Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me.
Rancher: But...
DEAO (pulling his badge out): No buts about it, mister.... See this badge? This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish, on any land. No questions asked or answers given. Have I made myself clear? Do you understand?
Rancher: Yessir. Pardon me for interfering.


A short time later, the old rancher hears loud screams and sees the DEA officer running for his life...

He is in that field over there being chased by the rancher's big Santa Gertrudis bull......

With every step the bull is gaining ground on the officer, and it seems likely that he'll get gored before he reaches safety.

The officer is clearly terrified, looking in the direction of the rancher for help.

The rancher throws down his tools, runs to the fence and yells at the top of his lungs.....

Your badge! Show him your BADGE !

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Urban Mary is.....

Woah...

Way too much....

I took the advice of Moooooog35 over at Mental Poo
and looked up my name at urbandictionary.com

Yeah...

So, then I thought I should narrow it down a bit and include my given middle name...

Now I am just:
A woman that a man uses to fill the void in his life.

So what else is new....

However, my chosen name Phillipia is as yet undefined...

A cute habit-wearing fruit-bearing humor blogger.

or...

A habit-wearing fruit-bearing blogger who tries to be cute and funny.

or...

Help me out...

But be gentle, please.




Wednesday, February 3, 2010

A day late....

Virgo Weekly Horoscope beginning January 30, 2010

Expect to have more people on your domestic scene.
Emotional relationships will be plentiful if you attend group activities.
Think be fore you act.
Unforeseen circumstances will disrupt your daily routine.
Don't be afraid to make a move if you aren't happy with your emotional
situation.
Your lucky day this week will be Tuesday.



Damn, its Wednesday...

yesterday was my lucky day....

And I did not even buy a lotto ticket...

Got to start reading these things at the beginning of the week...

Sunday, January 31, 2010

Pa Rock's Dead Pool

I have submitted my entries:
Barack Obama
Tiger Woods
Joe Cocker
Queen Elizabeth
Stephen Tyler
Macaulay Culkin
Betty White
Jack Nicholson
MeatLoaf (I sure hope I am wrong)
OJ Simpson

I do not wish death on any of these people....

I hope none of them are already dead because that would probably disqualify me...

I promise not to help them reach their final destination just for my benefit....

Or for any reason....

You have until midnight to submit your entries to Rocky Macy.

Contest rules are posted at: Pa Rocks Ramble





This is a mixed bag...

My Horoscope for today....

Because I needed to know....

Quickie: You're no longer worried about the details. You've gained a healthy perspective.

Overview: There are plenty of people who need your help today -- so look around and offer! Friends, family, colleagues and strangers all appreciate what you've got to give, and there's lots to go around.

Extended Overview: You've just about had it with the veiled comments and sarcastic remarks that have been tossed your way lately on a far too regular basis. It's probably family members that have been at it, but regardless, you're ready to stop being nice and fight back. Well, good for you. Why put up with something you know you don't deserve -- especially when you know you'd never do this to them? Words can hurt far worse than weapons, if they're aimed at the heart.


Excuse me while I go digest this...

Damn...


I did NOT win the lotto....

Again...

How many times do I need to play this thing to win???


WTF????

It is 8:53 on a Saturday night...

The doorbell rings...

By the time get up the stairs to answer it...

Noone's there....

I am sure it was my knight in shining armour...

But I was just too fricking slow getting to the door...

Damn...

Oh well...

His loss....