For all our guys who have trouble understanding us...

When we say:----->We Mean:

We need----->I want

It's your decision----->The correct decision should be
                                       obvious by now

Do what you want----->You'll pay for this later 

We need to talk----->I need to complain 

Sure...go ahead----->I don't want you to.

I'm not upset----->Of course I'm upset, you moron. 

You're...so manly----->You need a shave and you sweat a lot.

You're certainly attentive tonight.----->Is sex all
                                                                     you ever think about?

I'm not emotional!  And I'm not overreacting!----->I have PMS.

Be romantic, turn out the lights.----->I have flabby thighs.

This kitchen is so inconvenient.----->I want a new house.

I want new curtains----->and carpeting, furniture, wallpaper...

Hang the picture there----->No, I mean hang it there! 

I heard a noise----->I noticed you were almost asleep.

Do you love me?----->I'm going to ask for something expensive.

How much do you love me?----->I did something today you're 
                                                         really not going to like...

I'll be ready in a minute.----->Kick off your shoes and find a
                                                   good game on T.V.

Is my butt fat----->Tell me I'm beautiful.
                   
You have to learn to communicate.----->Just agree with me. 

Are you listening to me!?----->[Too late, your dead.] 

Yes----->No

No----->No 

Maybe----->No

I'm sorry.----->You'll be sorry.

Do you like this recipe?----->It's easy to fix, so you'd better
                                                get get used to it.

I'm not yelling!----->Yes I am yelling because I think this
                                   is important.
  
In answer to the question "What's wrong?"
  
The same old thing.----->Nothing. 

Nothing.----->Everything.

Everything.----->My PMS is acting up.

Nothing, really.----->It's just that you're such a jerk.

I don't want to talk about it.----->Go away, I'm stil building up
                                                           evidence against you.