A few weeks ago I heard a scream from the shower upstairs...you'd think there was a girl up there, but it was just G-man (I have to believe if there was a girl he would not have admitted to the scream).
Me: You ok up there G-man?Ok then...He's fine.
G-man: Yeah, I'm fine.
Me: What happened?
G-man: I'm FINE!!!!
A few minutes later as he is getting ready to leave for school (I believe)...
Me: Are you ready to go...
G-Man: In a few.. (what - minutes??? hours??? days ??? just asking because I want to know what to tell them next time they call and say you aren't at school: oh, don't worry, he'll be along any day know)
Me: I am going to get a quick shower and head into work.
G-man: Watch out for the spider up there...
Me: Oh, so is that what the scream was about?
G-man: It was huge. Quit laughing..it was...huge...
WAS- that is the key word, because the only spider up there was almost big enough to see...Of course, I am aging and my eyes are not what they used to be, but still...
Then, just yesterday, G-man was telling me about this HUGE reddish orange spider crawling on his arm as he is driving down the main drag of Willoughby OHIO...
G-man: This thing was huge, Mom.Say what???? I worry too much???
Me: As huge as the one you found in the bathroom last month?
G-man: At least...quit laughing - it was HUGE.
Me: Whose laughing? (I have a natural smile - I cannot help that it is evil looking.)
G-man: So anyway, I stopped my car, got out, took off my flip-flop and starting beating the hell out of that spider - then through his ass out of my car...
Me: In the middle of the road - on Euclid Avenue????
G-man:Yeah, this thing was huge, probably deadly.
Me: Not in front of the police station I hope???
G-man: Around there...
Me: Say what??? Are you crazy??? Did anyone say anything to you...you are lucky you did not get a ticket for road rage...
G-man: Mom, cool it, I'm G-man...noone is going to say anything..you worry too much...
How do you get through doors, because your head is so big, there is not a door big enough...
Time for a take down session, buddy...
Mom vs G-man...
And rest assured MOM will win...
MOM (aka Sr. Mary Phillipia) had GOD on her side...
Boys - they turn into men so young.
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2 comments:
Haha..great story to tell his girlfriend. I don't like spiders either, but killing them is sufficient. The thing that got me one time was one morning after just stepping out of the shower.. naked of course.. only to discover a huge (and yes, it was like 3 inches long) centipede running towards me with its tail curled upwards in my direction. Holy shit! I screamed bloody murder..couldn't even step on it.. my then husband said he thought someone had broken into the house with a weapon!.. and where was *he*? Cowering behind the couch... yeah, thanks a lot for your help buddy..
Spiders? They don't bug me so much. It is those giant centipede / millipede things that creep me out. Once in a while I find one of them caught in a spider's web. Yea, spider!
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