Thursday, April 23, 2009

Finally...

A pharmaceutical advertisement that makes sense...coming soon to your local cable network...
Do you have feelings of inadequacy?
Do you suffer from shyness?
Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or pharmacist about Margaritas.

Margaritas are the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident about yourself and your actions.

Margaritas can help ease you out of your shyness and let you tell the world that you're ready and willing to do just about anything.

You will notice the benefits of Margaritas almost immediately and with a regimen of regular doses you can overcome any obstacles that prevent you from living the life you want to live. Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past and you will discover many talents you never knew you had.

Stop hiding and start living, with Margaritas.

Margaritas may not be right for everyone. Women who are pregnant or nursing should not use Margaritas. However, women who wouldn't mind nursing or becoming pregnant are encouraged to try it.

Side effects may include but are not limited to:
  • Dizziness, nausea, vomiting, incarceration
  • Loss of motor control and balance
  • Loss of clothing
  • Loss of money
  • Table dancing
  • Lap dancing
  • Headache, sensitivity to light and noise
  • Dehydration
  • Dry mouth
  • Diarrhea of the mouth
  • An overpowering desire to sing Karaoke
Do not take more than the prescribed dosage; symptoms of overdose include the uncontrollable desire to make midnight phone calls to ex-lovers, the need to tell your friends over and over again how much you love them, fantasies of being as attractive to members of the opposite sex as they are to you, and actually fulfilling your dream of singing and dancing on stage with the band.

4 comments:

Winky Twinky said...

...are you having me followed?...

Shawn said...

Awesome. Makes me want a Margarita...and it's only 9:30 in the morning. Eh, why not.

Winky Twinky said...

Hey Shawn..... I t's 5:00 somewhere!!!

Phillipia said...

Winky - ya caught me...and yes it is 5:00 somewhere...always:)