Friday, May 29, 2009

Wedding Invitation...

If there ever was a wrong reason to go to a wedding...

I take that back...this does not stack up anywhere near to
Wedding Crashers, but in every day (not the movies) life, this is pretty good.

Count me in...


A Peyton PHlaCe co-worker employs an Amish cleaning lady (yeah said co-worker must make lots more than I do) - an OCD Amish cleaning lady, but that would make this post crazy long and I have other things I should be doing, so I'll leave that for some other day...


Anyway, said co-worker received a wedding invite from her cleaning lady...

  • I am getting married next month. Alright...now you can get rid of that embarrassing last name "Lapp" and my husband can quit making jokes...
  • I am marrying my neighbor, Amos Lapp. ...or come up with a whole new set of jokes...
  • I would like you and your husband to be at my wedding. Oh lord, how can I politely say no; we will be soooo out of place; I do not own a bonnet....
  • It is on a Tuesday. Awww, tuesday is a work day in non_amish country...damn...and I so wanted to be there...
  • ...in the late evening.....wonder how late i have to work that Tuesday...
  • ...at my parents home in Amishville. Ah...a small family wedding then - maybe we can handle this.
  • We only invited about 650 people. Scratch that.
  • They say to only expect half to show up...geez, only half of the county?...damn...and "they" being who????...the other half???
  • We are putting tents up in case it rains... ya mean we won't all fit in your house???? how many outhouses are the men constructing???
  • We have trained the goats to be gentle...gentle??? at what????
  • So will you be there? ...Wouldn't miss it for the world...care if I bring a friend? a nun - she needs some fodder...I mean material...I mean she loves weddings...

7 comments:

Winky Twinky said...

I wouldn't wear any loose fitting clothes, cause goats will be goats...and you'll probably have to take your own Jose...Sounds like a blast...NOT..

Waltsense.com said...

Hell yeah - crack open the tequila and the Corona. It would be great to show up like the 3 amigos wearing sombreros. I would bring a tray of nachos and cheese and introduce myself as Speedy to everyone.

Phillipia said...

I like the way you think, Walt.

Haley said...

I think your coworker needs to rent a horse team for the night and make her own clothes for the event. She also needs to take you so you can write about it and report back.

Phillipia said...

I agree Haley, I tried to get her to take me, but she overheard that I was I wanted to sneak in Jose and well - she just does not know how to have fun...

But...not to fear...I have a plan...

Who is going to notice one more plain-clothed homely looking guest?

Da Old Man said...

Since they don't use cameras (the whole soul stealing thing) do they have a caricaturist to make memories?
You need to go and report back.

LiLu said...

You have to go... just for the fodder, you HAVE to!